所属成套资源:备考2024届高考英语一轮复习第二部分读后续写
备考2024届高考英语一轮复习第二部分读后续写专题二热考话题素材7社会温情
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这是一份备考2024届高考英语一轮复习第二部分读后续写专题二热考话题素材7社会温情,共3页。
[2022浙江改编]I needed t d smething in my cmmunity(社区) in rder t cmplete the cmmunity service hurs required t graduate frm high schl. Sme f my friends had signed up t spend time at a sup kitchen, s I did, t. It seemed like a gd thing t d.
I thught that we wuld just be passing ut dinners t thse in need, but I fund ut we wuld be ding everything frm preparing t serving the dinner. We began preparing the fd, frm mixing salad dressing t separating frzen meat. Much still needed t be dne befre dinner was served, but already utside the building many hmeless peple were gathering. It wasn’t until a cuple f hurs later that we pened the drs and began serving dinner.
As the line f peple came tward me, I gt a little scared. I’d cme face t face with the hmeless: Hw shuld I act? Hw wuld they treat me? Wuld they hate me fr having mre than they did? While sme f the peple lked very friendly, sme f them lked s dangerus. I didn’t have t much time t wrry abut it. I was assigned(分配) t serve the salad with the lady next t me. She smiled at me and said if I needed help, she’d be right there, which I fund quite cmfrting.
I had never seen s many peple wanting fd. They were f all ages and natinalities. Mst f them wre clthes that were trn and dirty. Sme lked like they had ttally given up n life, while thers seemed t be making the best f the situatin, smiling and jking. Sme were better ff than thers, but they all needed a gd meal and a warm place t eat. It saddened me t think f hw many peple there were wh didn’t have a place t call hme and that the nly fd they gt came frm a sup kitchen.
As they came in my directin, I put n my brightest and happiest smile.
I was s happy that I had earned my service hurs in this way.
1.They left with thanks.
①用friendly wrds f gratitude代替句中的thanks,增加用词的丰富性。
They left with friendly wrds f gratitude.
②运用主语从句优化句①,表现这群无家可归的人的友好举动给"我"带来的触动。
What mved me mst was that they left with friendly wrds f gratitude.
2.I felt happy.
①用形容词(tired, wrn ut)作状语,与happy形成对比,从而凸显帮助别人带来的快乐。
Tired and wrn ut, I felt happy.
②用形象具体的情感表达替换happy,强调发自内心的快乐。
Tired and wrn ut, I felt deep pleasure welling up frm the bttm f my heart.
③为句②增加原因状语,并用现在分词短语作状语,体现"我"的快乐来源,使行文更加顺畅自然。
Tired and wrn ut,seeing what I did make their day, I felt deep pleasure welling up frm the bttm f my heart.
3.We can actually cmfrt the pr peple and lift ur wn spirits.
①利用nt als来升级句式,让表达更有层次。
We can nt nly actually cmfrt the pr peple, but als lift ur wn spirits.
②利用倒装结构,升级句式表达,让句子更为亮眼。
Nt nly can we actually cmfrt the pr peple, but als we can lift ur wn spirits.
Astheycameinmydirectin,Iputnmybrightestandhappiestsmile. I fund a lt f hmeless peple in need f smething t eat were waiting in the queue(排队等候). In the next few hurs I was very busy giving ut the meat and ther fd items int their hands. And what mved me mst was that they left with friendly wrds f gratitude(友好的感激之词) after getting fd. Tired and wrn ut(筋疲力尽), seeing what I did make their day, I felt deep pleasure welling up frm the bttm f my heart(发自内心的快乐).
IwasshappythatIhadearnedmyservicehursinthisway. It was definitely a rewarding thing t d the cmmunity service! Thrugh this unfrgettable experience, I earned smething mre valuable. T help the peple in need is als a help t myself. By ffering the vluntary assistance, nt nly can we actually cmfrt the pr peple, but als we can lift ur wn spirits(振奋我们自己的精神), which can help build a better wrld with warmth and friendliness fr all f us. I wuld vlunteer t help mre peple in the future.人物
文章涉及的人物有"I",the hmeless和the lady next t me。通过原文中的描述"I the cmmunity service hurs required t graduate" "As the line f peple came tward me, I gt a little scared"和"It saddened me t think f hw many peple there were wh didn’t have a place t call hme"可以看出,"我"是一个务实、对无家可归的人既害怕又同情的学生,在续写部分可以通过描写"我"在近距离给无家可归的人分发食物后获得的感悟来体现人物的积极蜕变。
情节及
情感线
为了完成高中毕业所要求的社区服务时间,"我"去了施粥所(感到开心和自豪)→"我"发现准备过程中要做的事情很多(感到有些疲惫)→开始施粥时,排队的人群靠近"我"(感到害怕)→"我"看到这么多无家可归的人(同情他们,为他们感到难过)
主题
根据续写第二段提示语"I was s happy that I had earned my service hurs in this way"可知,本文应该体现帮助别人、快乐自己的主题。
续写
第一段
根据本段首句可知,本段主要讲"我"克服对无家可归的人的恐惧和偏见,快乐地为他们分发食物,尾句衔接第二段提示语:"我"在施粥的过程中感受到快乐。本段主要通过动作和感受描写推动故事情节的发展。
续写
第二段
根据本段首句可知,本段应该主要讲"我"对这次经历的感悟。结尾部分适当升华主题:帮助别人、给别人带去了快乐的同时也使自己快乐。
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