2023届高考英语二轮复习概要写作示例与写作训练含答案

  概要写作示例与写作训练3

【写作示例】

【原文呈现】

阅读下面短文，根据其内容写一篇60词左右的内容概要。

Food serves as a form of communication in two fundamental ways. Sharing bread or other foods is a common human tradition that can promote unity and trust. Food can also have a specific meaning, and play a significant role in a family or culture's celebrations or traditions. The foods we eat—and when and how we eat them—are often unique to a particular culture or may even differ between rural (农村的) and urban areas within one country.

Sharing bread, whether during a special occasion (时刻) or at the family dinner table, is a common symbol of togetherness. Many cultures also celebrate birthdays and marriages with cakes that are cut and shared among the guests. Early forms of cake were simply a kind of bread, so this tradition hits its roots in the custom of sharing bread.

Food also plays an important role in many New Year celebrations. In the southern United States, pieces of corn bread represent blocks of gold for prosperity (兴旺) in the New Year. In Greece, people share a special cake called vasilopita. A coin is put into the cake, which signifies (预示) success in the New Year for the person who receives it.

Many cultures have ceremonies to celebrate the birth of a child, and food can play a significant role. In China, when a baby is one month old, families name and welcome their child in a celebration that includes giving red-colored eggs to guests. In many cultures, round foods such as grapes, bread, and moon cakes are eaten at welcome celebrations to represent family unity.

Nutrition is necessary for life, so it is not surprising that food is such an important part of different cultures around the world.

【思维路径】

[核心内容]

本文是一篇说明文，全文共分五段。第一段主要讲了食物和文化有着深刻的联系，不同的文化包含着不同的饮食传统和庆祝方式。食物通过这两种基本的方式扮演着沟通的角色。第二段以分享面包为例，说明了分享食物可以促进团结和建立信任。第三段举了两个具体的列子说明食物在庆祝新年时起的重要作用。第四段解释了食物在其他一些庆祝仪式中所扮演的角色，如新生命的诞生，家庭的团聚。第五段总结全文，俗话说，民以食为天，食物在不同文化当中的作用如此之大其实不足为奇。

[写作思路]

(1)理清文章脉络、概括段落大意。理清文章脉络、概括段落大意是写摘要的基础，同学们可以通过找主题句、分析段落的逻辑关系来梳理文章的脉络，概括大意。该文第一段的主题句是Food serves as a form of communication in two fundamental ways；第二第三段主题句是段落的首句。第四段没有明显的主题句，但是可以归纳为food plays an important role in many other ceremonies such as family unity；第五段的整一句句子是本段的主题句。

(2)确定表达要点、灵活准确表达。每段的段落大意都是我们要表达的要点，这可以确保不漏点。本文的摘要要把全文第一句作为一个要点，因为它是全文的逻辑起点。在确定表达要点后要思考如何准确灵活表达，这是难点。因为评分标准要求完全使用自己的语言。灵活表达的重要技巧是对原来的语言进行同义替换(paraphrase)，同时要对相关内容进行整合。第一段主要讲了食物作为一种沟通方式对文化起了两种基础性的作用，所以可以将第一段概括成“Food can be a way of communication in two basic ways”，是概要当中的要点1,；第二段以分享面包为例，说明了食物可以承载团圆之意，为避免照抄原文，可将原文“is a common symbol of togetherness”转换成“carry the meaning of unity”，为要点2；第三段讲到在新年之际，人们会吃一些特别的食物，比如在蛋糕中放入钱币，这其实是人们将新年的美好愿望承载于食物当中，因此可以表达成“Food bears people’s best wishes”，这一点信息是要点3；第四段是对第三段更进一步的说明，即在其他的一些庆祝仪式上，食物也充当着重要的作用，包含着特定的意义，如文中的两个例子，代表新生命的红鸡蛋和代表家庭团圆的圆形食物，概要当中可将这两点简要概括成要点4。最后一段主要强调了食物对于文化的重要作用取决于它是人类安生立命的必需品，概要中用necessity一词强调了食物的这一作用，为要点5。

[参考范文]

    Food can be a way of communication in two basic ways.(要点1)Sharing bread on some special situations carries the meaning of unity. (要点2)In many New Year celebrations, food bears people’s best wishes such as success and prosperity. (要点3)Moreover, food also plays an significant part in other ceremonies such as family unity and celebrations for the new born.(要点4) As food is such a necessity, it is not surprise to know its vital role in different cultures. (要点5)(76 words)

[范文解析]

    范文把要点1当中的two fundamental ways替换成two basic ways；要点2省略了文中的具体例子，用unity一词来概括了分享食物这一传统所包含的意义；要点3和要点4都旨在说明在各种庆祝仪式中食物充当的作用，要点4是要点3的补充，所以范文中用了moreover一词，表明递进。原文第三和第四段给出多个例子来支撑短首的中心句，由于受到字数的限制，范文用了几个名词性短语family unity, celebrations for new born, success and prosperity高度概括了文章所给的例子；要点5用necessity替换了原文中的形容词， 用its vital role代替such a important part，含义相同，简洁易懂。

[提炼归纳]

1. 语义转换

语义转换是新题型概要写作中很重要的一项基本技能，因为评价标准对“使用自己的语言进行观点的独立表达”有较高的要求。 范文中我们将“团结的象征symbol of togetherness”表达为“meaning of unity”，意义相同，可避免与原文重复。原文第二段和第三段都在讲食物在不同文化中承载的意义，为避免用词单一，范文先后用了carry和bear来表达“承载”的意思。

2. 要点整合

为了达到概要写作规定的字数，在准确梳理原文要点的基础上，我们需要对原文的观点进行必要的整合，可以帮助我们更简洁、有效地表达。本篇文章主要是通过论点加例子的形式进行论证的，在形成概要的过程中，例子是“茎”，论点是“秆”，论点当中的要点一个都不能少，那么相应的例子必须做到极其的简练概括，范文中family unity, celebrations for new born, success and prosperity等名词性质的短语都是对大篇幅例子的概括处理。

【写作演练】

1.阅读下面短文,根据其内容写一篇60词左右的内容概要.

Parents everywhere praise their kids. Jenn Berman, author of The A to Z Guide to Raising Happy and Confident Kids, says, "We've gone to the opposite extreme of a few decades ago when parents tended to be more strict." By giving kids a lot of praise, parents think they're building their children's confidence, when, in fact, it may be just the opposite. Too much praise can backfire and, when given in a way that's insincere, make kids afraid to try new things or take a risk for fear of not being able to stay on top where their parents' praise has put them.

Still, don't go too far in the other direction. Not giving enough praise can be just as damaging as giving too much. Kids will feel like they're not good enough or that you don't care and, as a result, may see no point in trying hard for their accomplishments.

So what is the right amount of praise? Experts say that the quality of praise is more important than the quantity. If praise is sincere and focused on the effort not the outcome, you can give it as often as your child does something that deserves a verbal reward. “We should especially recognize our children's efforts to push themselves and work hard to achieve a goal,” says Donahue, author of Parenting Without Fear: Letting Go of Worry and Focusing on What Really Matters. “One thing to remember is that it's the process not the end product that matters.”

Your son may not be the best basketball player on his team. But if he's out there every day and playing hard, you should praise his effort regardless of whether his team wins or loses. Praising the effort and not the outcome can also mean recognizing your child when she has worked hard to clean the yard, cook dinner, or finish a book report. But whatever it is, praise should be given on a case-by-case basis and be proportionate(相称的)to the amount of effort your child has put into it.

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2.阅读下面短文，根据其内容写一篇60词左右的内容概要。

Elephants can tell

It is easy for us to tell our friends from our enemies. But can other animals do the same? Elephants can! They can use their sense of vision and smell to tell the difference between people who pose a threat and those who do not.

In Kenya， researchers found that elephants react differently to clothing worn by men of the Maasai and Kamba ethnic groups. Young Maasai men kill animals and thus pose a threat to elephants； Kamba men are mainly farmers and are not a danger to elephants.

In an experiment conducted by animal scientists， elephants were first presented with clean clothing or clothing that had been worn for five days by either a Maasai or a Kamba man. When the elephants recognized the smell of clothing worn by a Maasai man， they moved away from the smell faster and took longer to relax than when they recognized the smells of either clothing worn by a Kamba man or clothing that had not been worn at all.

Clothing color also plays a role， though in a different way. In the same study， when the elephants saw red clothing not worn before， they reacted angrily， as red is typically worn by Maasai men. Rather than running away as they did with the smell， the elephants acted aggressively(攻击性地) toward the red clothing.

The researchers believe that the elephants’ emotional reactions are because of their different understanding of the smells and the sights. Smelling a potential danger means that a threat is nearby and the best thing to do is run away and hide. Seeing a potential threat without its smell means that risk is low. Therefor， instead of showing fear and running away， the elephants express their anger and become aggressive.

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3.阅读下面短文，根据其内容写一篇60词左右的内容概要。

Why is America's Milk Industry in so much trouble?

For much of The 20th century, milk was a simple part of daily life in the U. S. , as farmers raised cows, milkmen delivered bottles and children drank it at school. But those days are fading—a fact emphasized by the announcement on Jan. 5 by Borden Dairy, a milk processor, that it is filing for bankruptcy protection. Borden, which said it was impacted by “market challenges facing the dairy industry,” follows Dean Foods, America's largest milk producer, which filed for bankruptcy protection in November.

America has fallen out of love with drinking milk and people are substituting water bottles for milk cartons. The downturn has been tough on dairy processors like Borden and Dean, which buy fresh milk from farms and use techniques like pasteurization(加热杀菌法) to create a consumer-safe beverage with a longer shelf life. For the past five years, thanks to technology that increased milk production, fresh-milk prices were relatively low. But prices began ticking up again last year, squeezing the processors' already tight margins. “Declining sales in a thin﹣margin business is not a good recipe for success,” says Mark Stephenson, director of dairy policy analysis at the University of Wisconsin. (Americans are still eating cheese, butter and ice cream, but fluid-milk processors such as Dean and Borden aren't big players in those businesses.)

Milk processors are also facing competition from big retailers, which have set up their own processing plants. In 2018, Walmart opened a milk﹣processing plant in Indiana to serve hundreds of stores in the Midwest, taking away approximately 95 million gal. of milk﹣processing business from Dean Foods.

On the other end of the supply chain, dairy farms are facing trouble of their own. The low prices that were a benefit to processors left small farmers struggling across the industry. The number of Chapter 12 farm bankruptcies in 2019 was up 24% from the previous year. “We're trying our best to hang on,” says Mary Rieckmann, a dairy farmer in Wisconsin whose family has turned to GoFundMe to keep their century﹣old farm running.

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4.阅读下面短文，根据其内容写一篇60词左右的内容概要。

On November 18, 1995, Itzhak Perlman, the world famous violinist, came on stage to give a concert at Lincoln Centre in New York City. If you have ever been to a Perlman's concert, you know that getting on stage is not easy for him. He got polio(小儿麻痹症) as a child, and has to walk with the aid of two crutches(拐杖) now.

That night Perlman walked slowly to his chair. Then he sat down and began to play. But, suddenly, one of the strings on his violin broke, You could hear it break—it broke with a loud noise. People thought to themselves, "He will have to get up to either find another violin or find another string for this one. " But he didn't. Instead, he waited a moment, closed his eyes and then signaled the conductor to begin again. The orchestra began, and he played from where he had stopped. He played with such passion and such power. Of course, everyone knows that it is impossible to play a symphonic work with just three strings. But that night Itzhak Perlman refused to know that. You could see him changing and recomposing the piece in his head

When he finished, there was a silence in the room. Then people rose and cheered. We were all on our feet, doing everything we could to show how much we appreciated what he had done. He smiled and then he said in a quiet tone, "You know, sometimes it is the artist's task to find out how much music you can make with what you have left.”

His words have stayed in my mind ever since I heard them. That is also the way of life. Perhaps our task in this quickly changing world in which we live is to make music, at first with all that we have, and then, when that is no longer possible, to make music with what we have left.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________5.阅读下面短文，根据其内容写一篇60词左右的内容概要。

If you haven’t seen or heard anything about Road Rage (路怒) in the last few months, you’ve probably been avoiding the media. There have been countless stories about this new and scary phenomenon, considered a type of aggressive driving. You’ve most likely encountered aggressive driving or Road Rage recently if you drive.

Why is this phenomenon occurring more than ever now and why is it something that seemed almost nonexistent a few short years ago? Experts have certain theories and all are probably partially correct. One suggestion is overcrowding. In the last decade, the number of the cars on the roads has increased by more than 11 percent, and the number of miles driven has increased by 35 percent. However, the number of new road miles has only increased by 1 percent. That means more cars in the same amount of space; and the problem is even serious in urban areas. Also, people have less time and more things to do. With people working and trying to fit extra chores and activities into the day, street levels have never been higher. Stress creates anxiety, which leads to short tempers. These factors, when combined in certain situations, can cause Road Rage.

You may think you are the last person who would drive aggressively, but you might be surprised. For instance, have you ever yelled out loud at a slower driver, sounded the horn long and hard at another car, or sped up to keep another driver from passing? If you recognize yourself in any of these situations, watch out!

Whether you are getting angry at other drivers, or another driver is visibly upset with you, there are things you can do to avoid any major conflict. If you are easily influenced to Road Rage, the key is to discharge your emotion in a healthy way. If you are the target of another driver’s rage, do everything possible to get away from the other driver safely, including avoiding eye contact and getting out of their way.

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答案与解析

1.【参考范文1】

Parents tend to go to extremes when it comes to pausing their kids. However, too much or too latte praise can be equally damaging. When giving praise, parents should be sincere and concentrate on the process instead of the result. Similarly, they ought to give praise for how much effort their kids have invested in the work.

【参考范文2】

Parents believe praising can help raise children's confidence, but too much praise may result in the opposite effect. Yet, too little praise can discourage them. According to some experts, it is the quality of praise rather than quantity that matters, which shows parents' sincerity and concentration on the process. Meanwhile, kids do deserve praise if they strive to do their duty. Anyway, the amount of praise depends on their performance.

【解析】

本文是概要写作。我们需要用正确的英语把给出的要点表达出来。动笔前，一定要认真分析要点，理解要点要表达的含义，不能遗漏要点，跑题偏题。本作文中给出的要点比较具体，故需要准确表达。文章第一段主要讲述在教育孩子方面，父母们走向另一个极端；第二段讲述过多的批评也是不合适的；第三段讲述专家说，重要的是表扬的质量而不是数量，这表明了父母对这个过程的诚意和专注。第四段讲述表扬的数量取决于他们的表现。写作时注意准确运用时态，上下文意思连贯，符合逻辑关系，尽量使用自己熟悉的单词句式，同时也要注意使用高级词汇和高级句型使文章显得更有档次。特别注意在选择句式时要赋予变化。平时除了加强词汇积累，写作联系以外，还可以适当记忆一些类似的范文，这样在考试中可以起到事半功倍的效果。

【范文点评】

高级句型：

1. Currently, contrary to what people did in the past, many parents think highly of their kids too often. ​译文：目前，与过去的做法相反，许多父母过于高度评价自己的孩子。

分析：what引导宾语从句。
2. It is said that what matters is not the quantity but the quality of praise.

译文：据说重要的不是表扬数量，而是表扬质量。

分析：使用It is said that 据说，what引导主语从句。

2.【参考范文】

Studies have shown that elephants can use their sight and smell to distinguish between those who pose a threat and those who do not. In Kenya, researchers have found that elephants respond differently to clothing worn by masai and Kamba people. The color of clothes also plays a role, albeit in a different way. The researchers believe that elephants' emotional response is due to their different interpretations of smells and sights.

【解析】

这是一篇概要写作。

写作步骤

1)细读原文。首先要仔细阅读短文，掌握文章主旨。文章主要说明了研究表明大象可以用它们的视觉和嗅觉来区分那些构成威胁的人和那些没有构成威胁的人。在肯尼亚，研究人员发现大象对马赛人和坎巴人穿的衣服反应不同。衣服的颜色也有一定的作用，虽然方式不同。研究人员认为，大象的情绪反应是因为它们对气味和景象的理解不同。

2)弄清结构，归纳段意。概要写作是写全文概要，不是写某一部分的概要，或者就某些问题写出要点。因此一定要弄清文章结构，归纳文章各段大意。

3)列出原文要点。分析原文的内容和结构，将内容分项扼要表述并注意在结构上的顺序。在此基础上选出与文章主题密切相关的部分。
  4)在写作时要特别注意下面几点：
(1)概要应包括原文中的主要事实，略去不必要的细节。
(2)安排好篇幅的比例，概要应同原文保持协调，即用较多的文字写重要内容，用较少的文字写次要内容。
(3)注意要点之间的衔接，要用适当的关联词语贯通全文，切忌只简单地写出一些互不相干的句子，但也不要每两句之间都加关联词语，以免显得生硬。
(4)不排斥用原文的某些词句，但不要照搬原文的句子，如果不能完全用自己的话语表达，至少对原文句子做一些同义词替换，如果结构上也能有一些转换会更好。
(5)计算词数，看是否符合规定的词数要求。
【范文点评】

本文描写详略得当，使用了高级词汇和高级句子。如：Studies have shown that elephants can use their sight and smell to distinguish between those who pose a threat and those who do not. 宾语从句和定语从句的运用；The researchers believe that elephants' emotional response is due to their different interpretations of smells and sights. 宾语从句的运用等高级句式。

3. 【参考范文】

American dairy industry is facing challenges as the consumers switch from milk to other beverages. Companies that process milk now have lower margins, making it hard to sustain the business. Big retailers who have their own milk﹣processing plants also take business away from dairy companies. Farmers who sell fresh milk for low prices now struggle to hang on.

【解析】

写作步骤

1)细读原文。首先要仔细阅读短文，掌握文章主旨。文章主要说明了随着消费者从牛奶转向其他饮料，美国乳制品行业正面临挑战。牛奶加工企业现在的利润率较低，很难维持这项业务。大型零售商有自己的牛奶加工工厂也从乳制品公司拿走生意。那些以低价出售鲜奶的农民现在都在为维持生计而挣扎。

2)弄清结构，归纳段意。概要写作是写全文概要，不是写某一部分的概要，或者就某些问题写出要点。因此一定要弄清文章结构，归纳文章各段大意。

3)列出原文要点。分析原文的内容和结构，将内容分项扼要表述并注意在结构上的顺序。在此基础上选出与文章主题密切相关的部分。

【范文点评】

本文描写详略得当，使用了高级词汇和高级句子。如：switch from，beverages，make it hard to do sth.等高级词汇；Companies that process milk now have lower margins, making it hard to sustain the business.运用现在分词作结果状语；Farmers who sell fresh milk for low prices now struggle to hang on.运用定语从句等高级句式。

4.【参考范文】

As a polio victim since his childhood, Itzhak Perlman always faced challenges bravely. (要点1) One night while Perlman, a world famous violinist, was performing at a concert, one string on his violin broke. (要点2) Instead of changing the violin or the string, he continued playing recomposed music with three strings, which won him the audience’s admiration. (要点3) He set a good example for us to live life to the fullest with what we have. (要点4)

【解析】

写作步骤

1)细读原文。首先要仔细阅读短文，掌握文章主旨。文章主要讲述了伊扎克·帕尔曼自幼患小儿麻痹症，他总是勇敢地面对挑战。一天晚上，世界著名的小提琴家帕尔曼在音乐会上演奏时，他的小提琴的一根弦断了。他没有更换小提琴或琴弦，而是继续用三根琴弦演奏重新谱写的乐曲，赢得了观众的赞赏。他为我们树立了一个好榜样，让我们充分利用我们所拥有的生活。

2)弄清结构，归纳段意。概要写作是写全文概要，不是写某一部分的概要，或者就某些问题写出要点。因此一定要弄清文章结构，归纳文章各段大意。

3)列出原文要点。分析原文的内容和结构，将内容分项扼要表述并注意在结构上的顺序。在此基础上选出与文章主题密切相关的部分。

【范文点评】

本文描写详略得当，使用了高级词汇和高级句子。如：victim，Instead of，set a good example for等高级词汇；One night while Perlman, a world famous violinist, was performing at a concert, one string on his violin broke.运用了时间状语从句；Instead of changing the violin or the string, he continued playing recomposed music with three strings, which won him the audience’s admiration.运用了非限制性定语从句等高级句式。

5.参考范文】

Road Rage has received much attention in the past few months.(要点1)Experts put forward some partially correct theories that can result in Road Rage.(要点2)It may be surprising to find that every one of us can be a Road Rage driver.(要点3)Fortunately, there are some reasonable ways for you to get out of Road Rage when you are annoyed with other drivers or another driver is in rage, such as avoiding eye contact, getting out of the way and so on.(要点4)

【解析】

这是—篇概要写作。文章讲述的是路怒现象，路怒产生的原因及给予读者的一些避免路怒的建议。

写作步骤

1. 细读原文。首先要仔细阅读短文，掌握文章主旨。文章第一段阐述了在过去的几个月里，公路暴怒受到了广泛的关注。第二段阐述了专家们提出了一些可能导致路怒症的部分正确理论。第三段阐述了令人惊讶的是，我们每个人都可能成为路怒症司机。最后一段阐述了幸运的是，当你对其他司机生气或其他司机生气时，有一些合理的方法可以让你摆脱“路怒症”，比如避免眼神接触，让道等等。

2. 弄清结构，归纳段意。概要写作是写全文概要，不是写某一部分的概要，或者就某些问题写出要点。因此一定要弄清文章结构，归纳文章各段大意。

3. 列出原文要点。分析原文的内容和结构，将内容分项扼要表述并注意在结构上的顺序。在此基础上选出与文章主题密切相关的部分。

【范文点评】

本文描写详略得当，使用了高级词汇和高级句子。如: put forward , result in , get out of等高级词汇; Experts put forward some partially correct theories that can result in Road Rage.定语从句等高级句式。全文中没有中国式英语的句式，显示了很高的驾驭英语的能力。另外，文章思路清晰、层次分明，上下句转换自然，为文章增色添彩。