高考英语书面表达读后续写——Everyday Heroes 课件

这是一份高考英语书面表达读后续写——Everyday Heroes 课件，共21页。PPT课件主要包含了A story，Kim，TJ Smith，a suspect，neighbors，rescue，kidnap，street，alley，Brad Ware等内容，欢迎下载使用。

Interpretatin f the Text 文本解读
TJ Smith; Brad Ware & his wife; Kim; the bearded man
Interpretatin f the Text 文本解读 (Wh)
the bearded man
Brad Ware & his wife
On a street in Wichita Falls, Texas.
Last December, n a crisp Saturday afternn
The bearded man kidnapped Kim;TJ Smith tried t rescue her.
Pssibly with the help f Brad Ware
If he lst her, TJ feared, she might never be fund alive.
Interpretatin f underlined wrds
catch her breath
walked away
kicking and biting
first thught
Interpretatin f given infrmatin续写首句解读 (G-N策略）
Para. 1 Once TJ hit the alley, he sptted the man a cuple f blcks dwn, standing in frnt f an abandned white huse.
Given Infrmatin
Para. 2 Alerted by Julie and ther neighbrs, the plice and the victim’s mther had arrived n the scene.
New Infrmatin
① n the street r near/in that huse
② Kim was saved. (pssibly by TJ and Ware)
① What was the huse like?② What did TJ see and d?③ Hw was Kim saved?
① What happened t Kim and the bearded man in the end?② Wh are everyday heres?③ Why are they cnsidered heres?
Para. 1 Once TJ hit the alley, he sptted the man a cuple f blcks dwn, standing in frnt f an abandned white huse. Its windws were busted, drs barded up, and yard ver-grwn. He was shving the panicked girl thrugh a windw. Just then, Ware and his wife pulled up. “Stay here,” Ware tld TJ as he tk ff tward the huse. Ware and the man fught with each ther, and finally Ware managed t take him dwn.
Para. 2 Alerted by Julie and ther neighbrs, the plice and the victim’s mther had arrived n the scene. Kim dashed int the safety f her mther’s arms. Meanwhile, fficers cuffed and arrested Raeshawn Perez, 26. there were a few heres that day, but Ware insisted that the quick-thinking, dgged 11-year-ld deserved mst f the credit.
对上述问题进行回答，我们就可以写出这样两段结尾：
点评：从故事情节上看，两个续写段落已经完整地交代了这个事件的结局。但是，从内容和语言角度看，续写第一段中hw was Kim saved应该是该故事最紧张，最扣人心弦的高潮部分，对这个部分进行细致的描述，不仅容易吸引读者也有利于烘托everyday heres这个主题，传递正能量。而本段仅仅用fight with去描述打斗过程，显得有些干瘪，让满心期待的读者颇感失望。续写第二段虽然清楚交代了受害者和犯罪嫌疑人的结局，以及对everyday heres这个主题进行了呼应，但是如果能再增加一些细节描写和人们对于该事件的评论的话会更符合本文的报道文学的特点，增加其可信度和可读性。
The Micr-skills Training in writing 表达微技能之动作表达：打斗篇
我们常说，行动从思想中来。动作描写是刻画人物的重要方法之一。人物在各种外在因素的作用下和不同性格的驱使下，会产生不同的表情、心理和动作变化。动作描写常常和人物的表情、心理描写相结合。准确细致的动作描写有助于更立体地反映人物的心理和性格特点，使得情节进展更加顺畅自然，人物形象栩栩如生，跃然纸上。本文主要聚焦打斗类的动作描写。
bear dwn n逼近let g f放开；松开crash/bump int撞到break int a run拔腿就跑slide/ sneak in潜入；溜进hit/kick sb in/n打/踢某人的（身体部位）hit sb with a lud crash砰地一声砸/击到某人 bite sb by his leg 咬住某人的腿leap/jump/hp nt/int/ff跳上/跳进/跳下pund against 反复击打；砰砰地猛击
11. thrw/aim sth at把…瞄准/对准12. dash fr 冲向13. rush/dive/jump int…withut pausing毫不犹豫地冲/跳进去14. catch up with赶上15. pull/ drag sb. int/nt把某人拉进/上16. race/chase after追赶17. restart/launch anther attack再次发动袭击18. wrap sb in ne’s arms紧紧抱住某人19. pull sb back int把某人拉回去20. drag…swiftly int/nt/ut f 把…迅速拉进去/上去/出去
II. 句子的积累He dashed alng the platfrm and jumped n the train.It started t rain s we dived int the nearest café.He bent dwn/ver and picked up a bk frm the flr.He cast a lk at the wman.He strmed ut f the rm and crashed the dr shut behind him.She fught him desperately, kicking and biting.She wuld scream and kick and lie n the flr drumming her heels. He held up his bicycle and threw it at the wlf, in the hpe that the wlf wuld be frightened away.Befre it culd realize what had happened, Paul had already pened the frnt dr and instantly pulled Mac int the car. Hardly had Mac std up when the wlf arrived and was abut t launch anther attack.
III. 片段的积累1. Every time I made a mve t get it, sme passing eye detected my purpse, and f curse I straightened up and lked indifferent, and pretended that I hadn’t been thinking abut the pear at all. This same thing kept happening and happening, and I culdn’t get the pear. I was just getting desperate enugh t brave all the shame, and t seize it, when a windw behind me was raised, and gentleman spke ut f it, saying: “Step in here, please.” 2. With great care she began the dangerus crssing, smetimes n her hands and knees, hardly daring t lk dwn between the sleepers int the wild fld waters belw. If she shuld slip, she wuld fall between the sleepers, int the rapidly flwing stream.3. Mac saw his last straw, jumped ff his bike and dashed fr the side f the car. He slammed the car dr wildly as the hungry wlf was almst reaching him. Paul quickly unlcked the dr and Mac dived int the car, ut f breath. The hungry wlf seemed unwilling t give up n its prey, grwling utside the windw. The frightened three sat inside trembling with hrrr with the wlf trying t enter the car. After what seemed a lng time, the exhausted wlf walked away, disappearing int the wds.
3. Mac was panic-stricken, Mac culd d nthing but clsed his eyes.改写：_____________(过去分词作状语), Mac culd d nthing but clsed his eyes.
2. The wlf kept grwling at them frm utside the car, and it unwilling t give up n its prey.改写：The wlf kept grwling at them frm utside the car, ___________________________(形容词短语作状语).
1. Henry walked alng the street aimlessly, and he was hungry and tired.改写：Henry walked alng the street aimlessly, _____________(形容词作状语).
Panic-stricken
unwilling t give up n its prey
hungry and tired
Have a try 牛刀小试：句子翻译与句型转换
Tip 1: 我们可以借助形容词或过去分词作状语来丰富细节描写。
3. a. Her heart was punding in her muth.b. She rushed t the frnt dr and punded the drbell with all her strength.合并句子：____________________________________________________________________________________________
1. a. The bearded man was bearing dwn n the little girl.b. The little girl let g f her new ty and fled away.合并句子： ____________________________________________________________________________________
With the bearded man bearing dwn n the little girl, she let g f her new ty and fled away.
2. a. Jack wrapped the thief in his arms.b. Jack yelled at his wife breathlessly, “call 911!”合并句子：_______________________________________________________________
With the thief wrapped in his arms, Jack yelled at his wife breathlessly, “call 911!”
With her heart punding in her muth, she rushed t the frnt dr and punded the drbell with all her strength.
Tip 2: 我们可以用with的复合结构来合并两个意义紧密关联的句子。
2. 翻译：他刚刚打算开门，这时突然有人拍了拍他的肩膀。______________________________________________________________________
1. a. He was just abut t tuch that vase.b. Just at that time, there came the barking f the dg, which suggested smene was cming.合并句子：_________________________________________________________________________________________________________.
He was just abut t tuch that vase when there came the barking f the dg, which suggested smene was cming.
He was just abut t pen the dr when suddenly smene patted his shulder frm behind.
Tip 3: 我们可以使用be abut t…when；hardly…when; n sner…than来描述两个接连发生的动作。
3. 翻译：他正要站起来，这时那头狼跳到他跟前只有几码的地方。___________________________________________________________________________________
He was just abut t rise t his feet when the wlf jumped right in frnt f him, nly a few yards away.
3. I rushed t the railway statin, ________________________________(结果被告知他们已经走了)。
Tip 4: 我们可以使用nly t d来表示事与愿违的结果。
nly t find herself t weak t d that.
2. Carl attempted t get away with the vase, __________________________________(结果发现自己已经被警察包围)。
nly t be tld that they had already left.
nly t find himself surrunded by the plice.
She attempted t stand up, ________________________________________(结果发现自己太虚弱了，站不起来)。
Pssible versin
Once TJ hit the alley, he sptted the man a cuple f blcks dwn, standing in frnt f an abandned white huse. Its windws were busted, drs barded up, and yard ver-grwn. He was shving the panicked girl thrugh a windw. Just then, Brad Ware and his wife pulled up. “Stay here,” Ware tld TJ as he tk ff tward the huse. With Ware nw bearing dwn n him, the man let g f Kim in the windw frame and walked away, almst calmly. He was abut t break int a run when Ware caught up with him. They struggled. Ware kicked the man in the grin and wrapped him in his arms. The man squirmed free and fled acrss the street. When he stumbled, Ware lunged and tacked him.
Pssible versin
Alerted by Julie and ther neighbrs, the plice and the victim’s mther had arrived n the scene. Kim dashed int the safety f her mther’s arms, safe and sund. The tw cried and hugged. Meanwhile, fficers cuffed and arrested Raeshawn Perez, 26. He was charged with aggravated kidnapping and was being held n $50,000 bnd as this issue went t press. There were a few heres that day, but Ware insists that the quick-thinking, dgged 11-year-ld deserves mst f the credit. “Yu knw, he’s the reasn why we managed t find the girl befre smething terrible happened,” Ware tld KFDX, a lcal newspaper. That news came as n surprise t TJ’s mther. “This is exactly his character,” says Angie Hess Smith. “His first thught is nt f himself. It’s always f thers.”
评点：这篇文章语言较为平实，表达干净利落，动作描写贯穿全文，推动着情节的发展。续写第一段是动作描写的高潮部分。因此，该段落在继续原文语言风格的同时，精选了一系列动作表达来准确还原当时的打斗场面，如shve sb thrugh; take ff tward; bear dwn n sb; let g f; break int a run; kick sb in the grin; wrap sb in ne’s arms; squirm free; flee acrss; lunge; tack等. 此外，with的复合结构以及句型be abut t d…when…的使用，使得句子表达更为紧凑连贯，也烘托了当时打斗场面的紧张氛围，凸显了her之一Ware的勇敢无畏。而续写第二段主要是为了交代故事主要人物的结局，以及凸显主题Everyday Heres。