13 出游见闻 中考英语书面表达高分作文攻略（全国通用版）

13 出游见闻

2024年中考英语书面表达高分作文攻略（全国通用版）

相关话题素材储备和写作指导

有关旅游的话题多种多样，可以是外出野营、游览风光、出国游学、交流访问等等，体裁形式也可以各不相同。“出游见闻” 属于事件描述类，所见所闻都应当以具体事件的措述来呈现，大部分是记叙文，也有部分是夹叙夹议，对所见所闻发表感想。

下面就以记叙文为例来详解如何写好这类文章。

实践案例

题目

Write a composition in at least 60 words on "A special trip”. (写篇题为“次特殊之旅"的短文，字数不得少于60个词。)

作为初中生，你肯定已经有过旅行的经历。哪次旅行是让你至今不忘、印象深刻的呢?发生的什么事情使得这次旅行如此特殊?请具体描述，与大家分享。

这篇全命题文章要求学生能够写出一-次旅行，并且要突出其“特殊”之处，那么就不能泛泛而谈某次旅行风景秀丽、文化多元等，而是要将这次旅行所发生的(特殊)事情通过叙事手法具体描述出来，因此可以确定这篇文章是记叙文。体裁确定以后，文章就好写了，选取旅行中一次特殊经历，交代清楚事情发生的前因后果，不要忘记文章最后要有感情上的升华。就这篇文章面言，可以写一写这次特殊旅行带给你的经验、教训、感悟等。

段落结构

根据题目要求，可以参考以下结构进行写作:

第一部分The 1st part

开篇点题。

I had a special trip which 1 still remember clearly.

Among all the travelling experiences, the tip to. was the most special one

第二部分The 2nd part

描述次特殊的旅行，语言生动，重点突出其特殊之处。

1 had the trip with .. when .

 During the trip to .... some special events happened.

第三部分The 3rd part

    这次旅行对你产生的影响等。

From  this special tip, 1 realize / learn that

 This special trip was unforgettable and meaningful because it not only enabled me to enjoy .. but also taught me ..

核心语汇

places of interest名胜古迹

tourist attraction观光胜地

scenic spots景点

go sightseeing去观光

the local / locals当地人

local culture and custom当地文化和习俗

show respect to 1 respect the local ...尊重当地的.....

 an exciting and meaningful trip一次有趣又有意义的旅行

 landmark building地标建筑

 enjoy the natural scenery享受自然风光

appreciate the human landscape欣赏人文风情

impressive and unforgettable印象深刻又令人难忘

参考句型

It is exciting for me/ I am excited to have a trip to ..去 ....旅行我很兴奋。

It is ... that makes the trip so special.....使得这次旅行如此特殊。

I learn from the special trip that I should ...从这次特殊的旅行中我学到，我应......

 Only after the special trip did I realize that ..这次特殊旅行后我才意识到....

Not until the trip came to an end did I realize ..直到旅行结束我才 意识到...

It was the special trip that taught me to ..正是这次特殊之旅教会我....

习作1

A special trip

One of the most impressive trips for me was the one to the city of  Ningbo.

Unlike any other city,I didn't need to worry about the dangerous cars there. Whenever1 was trying to cross the road, all the drivers would politely wait because of the rule of pedestrains first.

Therefore, it was the perfect traffic that made the trip very special and I rally thought the traffic in my city should be improved like this, which would definitely reduce the number of traffic accidents.

点评:

该生审题有误，内容及体裁上均有不当之处。首先从内容上讲，与其说这篇文章的主题是“一 -次特殊之旅”，不如说是介绍“-座特殊之城”，因为文章没有通过事实来描述某次旅行的特殊之处，而是对宁波这座城市的特点泛泛而谈，而且，学生所提到的“交通秩序好”并没有用有效的语言描述成非常特殊的方面。其次从体裁上讲，这篇文章不能算作是记叙文，没有特定事件的描述，这也是明显不符合题目要求的。但该生在语言方面的表现还是可取的，比如运用强调句、定语从句等，词汇方面也较为地道流畅。如果内容的选取上没有失误就更好了，可见认真审题的重要性。

修改稿

A special trip

One of the most impressive trips for me was the one to the city of  Ningbo.

I remember when I was about to cross the street and looking around for the traffic, a kind driver stopped his bus in front of me and waved his hand to show me that I could go first. How surprised I was! I noticed the passengers on his bus didn't show annoyance but waited for me to cross the street, too. Later, I learned that everyone in Ningbo was a firm supporter of the traffic rule of pedestrians first. Indeed, I didn't need to worry about the dangerous cars in this city.

 Therefore, it was the perfect traffic that made the trip very special and I really thought the traffic in my city should be improved like this, which would definitely reduce the number of traffic accidents.

习作2

Last year, my family had a trip to a remote mountain area for its unique natural beauty.It turned out to be very special for me.

When we walked along the narrow road, we came across a little girl who kept staring at our camera, so I offered to take a photo for her. She agreed with great joy, and asked if I could send the photo to her father who worked in a far place. I did what she expected me to do and she thanked me many times. As for me, I felt extremely happy too.

 It was this incident that made the trip so special, and I learned that helping others helped me gain happiness too.

点评:

这篇习作对主题的把握是比较到位的，通过去年一次乡村之旅期间发生的一件小事，来突出这次旅行的特殊之处:予人玫瑰，手有余香。对该事件的叙述也是清晰流畅，简洁明了。从语言上看，该生会用turn out、come across等表达，会用强调句、定语从句等，都是有助于提高分数和档位的方法和手段，值得大家借鉴。

相关话题范文解析

（一）

为丰富初三学生课余生活，上周末你校组织了一次社会实践活动。请根据以下内容提示，用英语写一篇短文，介绍此次活动，并谈谈自己的感想。

活动内容：

1．上午游览人民公园：欣赏美景、歌舞联欢、拍照留念；

2．下午参观市民广场：观看图片展，了解祖国和家乡70年巨变。

你的感想：

1．师生情深，感谢老师和同学的帮助；

2．倍受鼓舞，决心勤奋学习报效祖国；

3. ……（考生自己发挥）

要求：

1．词数100左右。开头已给出，不计人总词数。

2．所写内容必须包括内容提示中所提供的信息，并可作适当的发挥。

3．不得出现真实的人名、校名、地名等相关信息。

参考词汇：市民广场Civic Square

In order to enrich Junior 3 students' after-school life, our school organized a social practice activity last weekend. All the teachers and students of our grade took part in it. _______________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

【写作思路】

这是一篇材料作文，根据材料中的相关信息介绍一下上周末你校所组织的一次社会实践活动。所提供的材料中列举了活动内容和你的感想。主要从：1．上午游览人民公园：欣赏美景、歌舞联欢、拍照留念；2．下午参观市民广场：观看图片展，了解祖国和家乡70年巨变。以及表达师生情深，感谢老师和同学的帮助；倍受鼓舞，决心勤奋学习报效祖国；（自己在发挥一些）。这几个方面去介绍。时态为一般过去时，人称为第一人称。注意作文中必须包含材料上的所有信息，并适当发挥。写作时，避免使用汉语式的英语，尽量使用我们熟悉的句子或短语。语法要正确，表达要符合英语习惯，注意时态、时间状语的搭配及主谓一致问题。写作中适当使用连词，注意上下文联系紧密，符合逻辑关系，表达具有条理性。

【参考范文】

In order to enrich Junior 3 students' after-school life, our school organized a social practice activity last weekend. All the teachers and students of our grade took part in it. In the morning, we visited the People’s Park. In the park, we enjoyed the beautiful scenery, danced and sang, and took pictures. I would like to thank my teachers and classmates for their help. In the afternoon, we visited the Citizen’s Square. In People's Square, we watched the photo exhibition and learned about the great changes of our country and hometown in the past 70 years. After seeing these photo exhibitions, I was inspired and determined to study hard to serve my country.

【名师点评】

【高分句型一】

I would like to thank my teachers and classmates for their help. 我要感谢我的老师和同学们的帮助。该句话用到了would like to do sth. 丰富了语言。

【高分句型二】

In People's Square, we watched the photo exhibition and learned about the great changes of our country and hometown in the past 70 years. 在人民广场，我们看了70年来的摄影展，了解了祖国和家乡的巨大变化。该句话的语言简练，层次分明，语意明确，用简单的句子表达了丰富的内涵。使人读起来朗朗上口。

相关话题满分作文必背

（一）

近几年，旅游已经成为一项全民活动。初中生们旅游的机会也有很多，因此，旅游也是初中生们津津乐道的话题。
  你的美国朋友Tom非常喜欢中国文化，去年暑假你和他一起从桂林出发去北京旅游了几天，你们参观了一些著名景点，还品尝了一些有名的小吃，请把你们的旅游经历写成一篇不少于80词的短文。
 

参考范文：

A Trip to Beijing    My American friend Tom and I went to Beijing by plane last summer.    On the first day，we visited the Palace Museum and Tian'anmen Square. The next day，we climbed the Great Wall. We took lots of photos. Although we felt tired，it was a fantastic experience. The third day we relaxed. Then we had the Beijing roast duck for lunch. I think it is the most delicious food in the world. Tom is interested in Chinese culture，so we drank tea and saw Beijing Opera in Lao She Teahouse in the evening. Finally，we did some shopping and flew back to Guilin.    The trip to Beijing was short，but it was wonderful. Tom said that he would never forget it.
 

（二）

假如你参加了学校组织的“走近乡村”寒假社会实践活动。请根据要求，向某英语网站投稿，分享活动经历。

要求：1.80~120词，可适当发挥，开头已给出，不计入总词数；

      2. 文中不能出现自己的姓名和所在学校的名称。

参考信息：

Have you ever got close to the countryside and had a special experience? Let me share mine!

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

【写作思路】

本文属于一篇图表作文，根据表格提供的信息来介绍“走近乡村”寒假社会实践活动的经历。人称为第一人称，时态主要为一般过去时。动笔前先要注意认真阅读材料确定写作内容；文章必须包括要点中所给的信息，既要写活动的过程，又要总结活动感受与收获。并补充两条个人的观点。表达要符合英语习惯，注意时态、时间状语的搭配及主谓一致问题。写作中适当使用连词，注意上下文联系紧密，符合逻辑关系，表达具有条理性。多种句式交叉使用来丰富文章的文采。高分句型：1.We experienced the life in the countryside, learned something that we couldn’t get from books before. 我们经历了农村的生活，学到了一些我们以前从书中得不到的东西。that we couldn’t get from books before.是定语从句，修饰不定代词something。2. We really hope we’ll have another activity like that this winter vacation! 我们真的希望今年寒假还能有这样的活动！hope后面是省略that的宾语从句。

【参考范文】

Have you ever got close to the countryside and had a special experience? Let me share mine.

During the winter vacation my classmates and I joined in the school activity “Get close to the countryside”. We live in the farmers’ homes. Their great living conditions surprised us a lot. Do you know where vegetables come from? We got the answer when working with the farmers. Besides, we learned about other plants and some farm animals. How interesting!

We experienced the life in the countryside, learned something that we couldn’t get from books before, and felt the wonderful changes of the countryside. We realized how hard the farmers worked and decided to save food. We were happy to see the farmers’ life was getting better and better. 

We really hope we’ll have another activity like that this winter vacation!